Oh Please! A satirical look at stories in the media Daily comments on the news stories that make you say Oh Please! en http://www.oh-please.co.uk Toby Young Would Not Overreac http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201108152 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201108152 He would not frogmarch his child to the police station for lootin Mon, 15 Aug 2011 00:01:00 +0100 Top Cop Opposes Supercop http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201108151 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201108151 ACPO Chief, Sir Hugh Orde says he doesn't want to learn about gang Mon, 15 Aug 2011 00:01:00 +0100 Police Called to Children Picking Flowers http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201103171 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201103171 Police were called to a Poole park where a mother ignored her children's bad behaviour Thu, 17 Mar 2011 00:01:00 +0000 The Olympics Threatened! http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201103152 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201103152 The clock has stopped! Tue, 15 Mar 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Midsommer Murders Man Suspended http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201103151 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201103151 Producer suspended due to lack of ethnic murder suspects Tue, 15 Mar 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Somerset Horticultural Society Doesn't Understand Competitions http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102141 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102141 73 year old David Stirzaker has been asked not to exhibit this year because he will win! Mon, 14 Feb 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Holiday Camps for Youths in Jail http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102042 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102042 Young offenders get a cushy life, but do not understand consequences! Fri, 04 Feb 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Suffolk Police Refuse to Fly the Flag http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102041 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102041 The Police in Suffolk do not know that the Union flag means all of us! Fri, 04 Feb 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Police Say Preston's Crime Hotspot is a Nice Place to be! http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102021 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102021 A new Home Office website, which cost £300,000 to develop, gives the wrong impression! Wed, 02 Feb 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Tower Hamlets Council Did What? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102012 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102012 They paid out £42,000 on celebrities! Tue, 01 Feb 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Finally! Good News http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102011 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201102011 Adam Potter survives 1000 ft fall down mountain! Tue, 01 Feb 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Plastic Soldier Has Gun Confiscate http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101313 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101313 Gatwick security guard needs reality check Mon, 31 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 The Met to Make Robust Inquiry into Hacking http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101312 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101312 Scotland Yard has promised a robust inquiry into phone hacking. But is this unusual? Mon, 31 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Senior Policeman Afraid of the Dark http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101311 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101311 An inspector in Cambridgeshire will not allow officers to patrol a park after dark! Mon, 31 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 The F1 World is Confused by Lotus http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101281 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101281 There may be two different Lotus teams at the start of the 2011 season and neither of them is actually the famous team. Fri, 28 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Austerity Mum is a Con http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101262 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101262 But doesn't she know people don't like having their noses rubbed in it? Wed, 26 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Virtual Fishing Rod Gives the Feel of the Strike http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101261 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101261 But why don't they just go fishing? Wed, 26 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Why Do Tax Men Earn Big Bonuses? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101252 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101252 Tax collectors get £13m in bonuses, but why? Tue, 25 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Gordon Brown Worries His Phone Is Tapped http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101251 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101251 The former Prime Minister has asked if his phone was tapped. Police said: who are you? Tue, 25 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Tony Blair Clarified His Evidence at the Iraq War Inquiry http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101241 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101241 The least said about that the better. Mon, 24 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 MP's Tie Causes Apology! http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101212 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101212 No, it isn't the sort of tie you think. Fri, 21 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Teachers' Leaders Are Opposed to Changes http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101211 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101211 But, do they know what is best, or are they just playing politics? Fri, 21 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Mr Sarkozy Hands Alsace Over To Germany http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101201 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101201 The head of state of any nation should know where he is at all times, especially whether he is aboard or not. Thu, 20 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Lord Taylor of Warwick Claims Colleagues Said It Was Alright http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101191 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101191 But why would an intelligent lawyer believe that? Wed, 19 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Ed Milliband Blames Brown http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101183 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101183 Although the current Labour leader was a member of the last government, his shows no compunction about stabbing his former boss in the back. Tue, 18 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Geordie Bar Manager Spared Jail http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101182 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101182 But why? He was convicted of three charges of sexual assault and had previous a conviction, but was given a community order! Tue, 18 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Vodka Eyeballing Could Make You Blind http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101181 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101181 You don't say! Tue, 18 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Ed Miliband Courts Lib Dems http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101173 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101173 The Labour leaders is encouraging Lib Dem supporters to join Labour Mon, 17 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Ken Clarke Still Thinks He Is Chancellor! http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101172 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101172 Mr Clarke seems to spend more time and energy saving money than running a justice system. Mon, 17 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Frustrated Kent Drivers Move Diversion Signs http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101171 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101171 But the holes in the road stay where they are! Mon, 17 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Tony Blair To Make New Appearance at Iraq War Enquiry http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101143 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101143 But do they think he will tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? Fri, 14 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Mayor Denied 3D Film on Health and Safety Grounds http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101142 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101142 The mayor of Peterborough was not allowed to rent a 3D movie by his local Blockbuster because of the hygiene risk caused by the cardboard glasses. Fri, 14 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Essex Police Force Pay Out £42,000 Because of Idiots http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101141 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101141 The police in Essex have had to pay out a fortune because its police officers insist on putting petrol into the tanks of the force's diesel vehicles. Fri, 14 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Cops Try To Nab Cannabis Rodent http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101132 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101132 Police helicopter detects cannabis heat source in a guinea pig hutch! Thu, 13 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Well Done Miriam O'Reilly! http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101131 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101131 Miriam O'Reilly has won an employment tribunal against the BBC whom she claims sacked her because of her age. Her former boss should thank her however! Thu, 13 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Lorry Driver is Raided Because Of Poor Insulation http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101121 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101121 Northumbria Police broke into and innocent man's home leaving him with a £500 repair bill. Wed, 12 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 How Bright Do You Have to be, to be Called a University? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101113 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101113 Second year students at the University of Cumbria couldn't believe their luck when the exam paper gave them the answers. Tue, 11 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Councils Waste Money Hand Over Fist on Branding http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101112 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101112 Why do councils think they need to spend millions on branding? We know why they are here after all! Tue, 11 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Alan Johnson Proves He Doesn't Know His Facts http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101111 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101111 The shadow chancellor had to be helped by the Sky News presenter when he couldn't answer a simple question. Tue, 11 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Nationally Owned Bank Pays CEO £2.5 Million Bonus http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101102 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101102 RBS looks likely to pay its CEO a large bonus, but shouldn't the bank be repaying us first? Mon, 10 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 What Is Happening In Great Tey? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101101 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101101 Dinner lady is sacked for doing her job and the head's job as well! Mon, 10 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Lady Ashton Gets £230,000 But Stays Away http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101071 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101071 Why are various officials being paid for not doing their jobs? Fri, 07 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Kent Students End Their Sit-In http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101061 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101061 Did you know that students in Canterbury were holding a sit-in? Thu, 06 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Are People Obstacles? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101051 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101051 It seems a university research group thinks so! Wed, 05 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Abolish Council Parking Charges: Is It a Ploy? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101042 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101042 Will our councils really abolish parking charges? Tue, 04 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Health and Safety at the Council is a Bigger Problem than Expected http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101041 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101041 Have you seen the pictures of piled up bin bags in the morning papers? Tue, 04 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Buildings Burnt to the Ground in Ford Open Prison http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101032 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101032 When will those in charge realise that there are bad people in the world? Mon, 03 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Health and Safety: What Does it Mean? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101031 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201101031 Is it an excuse or is it a reason to be imaginative? Mon, 03 Jan 2011 00:01:00 +0000 Woman Skates On Thin Ice With Children http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201012292 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201012292 What on earth was she doing on Whitestone Pond with small children? Wed, 29 Dec 2010 00:01:00 +0000 Would Vettel Want to Move From RBR? http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201012291 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201012291 Ferrari president talks of Vettel moving from RBR. Why would he? Wed, 29 Dec 2010 00:01:00 +0000 Tube Drivers to Strike On Boxing Day http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201012242 http://www.oh-please.co.uk/fp.php?k=201012242 The tube drivers wanted triple pay to work on Boxing Day. Fri, 24 Dec 2010 00:01:00 +0000